General

A Pie in the Face.

“Since political correctness has become the norm in our society the normal man in the street has had a lot to be angry at.  The normal man in the street has found the life in which he lives in is beset on all sides. No longer allowed to voice an opinion or make an intelligent humorous joke  (to which he is entitled to do),  for if it offends anyone, ultimately opening himself up to possibly losing his job, online bullying, loss of the respect of his peers and in extreme cases physical abuse and confrontation. All justified because he is an “offender” and anyone who felt offended has rights that far outweigh the initial offending act.”

Read on kamsriv.wordpress.com/2020/07/09/a-pie-in-the-face/

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“Mind” your business

An old man was selling watermelons. His price list read: 1 for £2 and 3 for £8.

A young man stopped by and bought 3 watermelons one by one, paying £2 for each.

As the young man was walking away, he turned around and told the old man, “Hey, do you realize I just bought three watermelons for £6 instead of £8? May be business is not your thing.”

The old man smiled and mumbled to himself, “People are funny. Every time they buy three watermelons instead of one, yet they keep trying to teach me how to do business.”

Source: Random

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A beautiful reminder from God..

I complain: The laundry basket never stays empty.

God reminds: Your family never goes without clean clothes to wear.

I complain: I hate to cook.

God reminds: Your family never goes without food to eat.

I ask: Why can’t my kids chill out for 10 minutes?

God reminds: You have never seen the inside of a children’s hospital.

I say: There isn’t enough time to do everything I need to do, much less what I want to do.

God reminds: So few of these things did I ask of you.

I say: I look older reflected in my minivan window.

God reminds: Yes. I gave you these years.

I ask: Will I ever be enough?

God asks: For who?

I say: I keep messing up. I worry. I raise my voice. I forget how lucky I am.

God reminds: Luck has nothing do with it. Everything in your basket, I put there with purpose. And I never asked you to carry it alone.

Credit: Mama Dickinson: Musings Of A Daydreaming Mom

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My little “Lady” is home

Still shying away from new people yet loves to cuddle with the ones she knows. Loves belly rubs from Kam and definitely understands the word ‘food’. She is naturally curious, processes stimuli more quickly, and reacts faster than I can. She can expertly read my body language and clearly see my intended plan before I am even fully thinking of it. I am finding myself having to play a lot of ‘catch up’ if I can’t stay one step ahead of my intelligent, hyper-active puppy. I am acquiring proficiency in a new language as I learn the many subtle and not-to-subtle sounds – barks, whines, growls, yodels, and sounds I did not even know she could make. I have a new, nosy companion trying to ‘help’ me complete my chores, or even trying to do them for me! Every day is a new day with her.

Showing all signs of being the world obedient and well-mannered dog, I am keeping my fingers crossed and knocking on every wood to ensure she grows up like so 😍

Let me give my fur baby another cuddle before she soon grows up in a big dog and hugs me instead 🤪

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#MeToo

So often its written about sexual harassment and about being abused as a child. I believe social media will set us free in many ways and bring a lot of taboos out of the closet. I realise not everyone can speak so openly and freely about it. But we’ve all experienced it.

The guy who smacked you hard across the chest as he went by on the bike so that you secretly nursed a purple breast for weeks. The man who just randomly thrust a hand between your legs as you climbed up ahead of him into the bus. The doctor who under cover of his stethoscope, felt up your non-existent 11-year-old chest. The colleague who always insists on bending over you and trying to look down your shirt. The uncle who pulls a 21-year-old girl into his lap and strokes her thigh, calling her beta all the while. The lecherous cousin your parents insisted would chaperone you to tuition.

There are plenty of people wondering how the #MeToo tag helps. Who think it is a waste of time. It helps because women who would NEVER have acknowledged it, or written about something of this sort have shared it today. And that is a big deal for them. It frees them from the burden of what feels like a deep dark secret. I’m watching the #MeToos pop up on my Facebook wall and I’m not surprised. And yes, there are men too.

No tag, no effort is perfect and complete in itself. So if this made you talk about the effectiveness of such a campaign, if you came up with the idea that people who have harassed other men or women should run a me too campaign, whatever, then that too, is proof that it worked. Just like an #IceBucketChallenge gave birth to a #RiceBucketChallenge.

Let’s not bitch about why something doesn’t work. If it’s made you think, then *you* improve on it. *You* start your own hashtag. *You* change your DP on Whatsapp. And it would have achieved its purpose.

Solidarity, strength in numbers, gaining and giving others the courage to speak out, a hashtag could do a lot – sure, it’s not “the ultimate solution” but it’s one more step in breaking the culture of silence, which in turn perpetuates the problem. And it speaks of the magnitude of the problem, which it says it has set out to do.

Change will come, slowly but surely.

#MeToo and a #MeToo again for those who can’t.

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Diagnose a crime

Many of my friends are initially going to be upset with what I start out saying, but it will make sense if you read it to the end.

The killing and mayhem at the concert in Las Vegas was heinous, brutal, evil, despicable, and should be categorically condemned by every decent human being. The incident elicits revulsion, horror and terror, *but it is not terrorism*.

I believe that the law enforcement agencies may be correct in not categorizing it as an act of terrorism. This has nothing to do with whether the mass murderer was white, black, yellow, brown, or fifty shades of beige. It has to do with the definition of terrorism, and subsequently with how law enforcements need to deal with it.

Terrorism is not about inflicting terror. It is not about the scale of the mayhem, but about motive. Terrorism, by definition, is about inflicting terror *as a strategic means to a political end*.

In the world of law enforcement, categorizing an incident does not end with identifying the act, but is a beginning towards enforcing (and amending, if necessary) the policies, frameworks, and activity to anticipate, detect, and prevent such incidents in the future.

The frequency of such events in the recent past is frightening. These are symptoms of a new disease that must be diagnosed correctly so it can be eradicated. The reason I find this more frightening, is because terrosim has context, connections, threads that can be unravelled and followed to the source. This is much more frightening, and the measures to counter this will necessarily be more invasive and intrude further into every individual’s personal space.

To misdiagnose a crime is to initiate the wrong preventive measures. To society, it is as fatal as misdiagnosing a brain tumor as a migraine.😥

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Problem Child??!!

It always breaks my heart when I hear someone described as the “problem child” in their family. It has been my experience that the rest of the family are usually the (creators and) maintainers of the undertow that pulls the “problem child” under. Problem Child expresses all the family dysfunction.

Sometimes, someone who gets labeled as that has issues that have nothing to with what someone else did or did not do or for or to them and to blame “the family” for that is sometimes unfair. That said, I’m not fond of the label.

I’ve read somewhere that in family therapy, many times the dysfunction of a child is a manifestation of the dysfunction of the parent’s marriage, and you have to treat the marriage in order to adequately address the child’s issues.

Yes!

It’s a matter of changing the reasons for your behavior to fit within your value system, so you’re doing it “for you” and not “against anyone.”

Not that anyone needs to justify their behavior to anyone, but if pressed to explain, it’s often far stronger to draw boundaries by explaining that you’re doing it for yourself and not because of anything the other person is doing.

The phrase: “it’s not you, it’s me” often seems like a cop out when you’re breaking up with someone, like you’re trying to preserve someone else’s feelings, but when it’s honest, it does reflect a firmer foundation for action when your motivation comes from within. It reminds me of the extrovert who didn’t want to marry the introvert and used the Netflix incident to call it quits when “it’s me it’s not you” would have worked more strongly and blocked appeals for second chances.

As people age, they have fewer life choices. Some respond to this by becoming more adamant in those decisions. They see questioning those choices as judgment on their competency to make those decision.

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Double standards

Many people in India lead double lives, have double standards, and use words which often have double meanings. There is nothing different or unique being a Marwari, Gujarati, Bengali or Marathi (and other castes which exists in India). The women have been subjugated for centuries to lead a life of secondary status and denied the freedom to pursue their own interests. This article could well be applied to any one of these with equal ease, without the tag of being a Marwari or Gujarati or Bengali. Why should we become judgemental on a particular community and feel ourselves superior?

I don't speak for others or for any community. All I know is that each one has to decide where the limits to hypocrisy and double standards as well as freedom are in one's way of life. It is not fair to paint a picture of a few instances and make them a general representative of an entire community. Mind you, I am not disputing the truth of these incidents; they exist. I know several families where older generation is far more liberal and tolerant in its attitudes towards dress, religious beliefs and food etc than expected by the younger newly married daughters-in-law in the family but they are not written about as they are not representative of the entire community.
It takes time to get rid of hypocrisy in a conservative society and accept everyone on an equal basis, particularly in our country where prejudices and restrictions against females are deep-rooted in several aspects of their life.

But it is happening…one day at a time!!

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Conquer 

Women CAN and DO dream, achieve, inspire, celebrate, EXIST, LIVE, ENJOY around the world. And they do all this without any assistance from men.

This post is for all those who think men are superior than women. The truth is simple. Apart from them being biologically different from one another, and leaving physical attributes aside, there is ABSOLUTELY NO DIFFERENCE in the way they think, act, react or what they can do. 

They’re equal. They’re independent, they’re strong, they’re very aware of their surroundings and they’re not ready to be bogged down by regressive ideologies. The world would cease to exist if any one of them would cease to exist, then how can we not treat them equally?

Women command respect JUST like men, and they WILL get that respect. NOT just on this day. 

Let’s pledge to give everyone equal respect, equal opportunities to grow and prosper, so that the world grows as one unit and conquers as one unit.

And irrespective of these hindrances & many more. Some of us still conquer. Imagine what we could do if we had equal rights in society..!!

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Accessibility denied!

England is old. Like centuries old. Millennia old. It didn’t surprise me one bit that much of it was essentially inaccessible to wheelchair users. In fact, I was much more often surprised at the extent that so many businesses, and individual people, went to in order to be accessible. Same with France. They have lifts in the Louvre! I don’t even know how old that palace is, but I know it ain’t easy to retrofit lifts into a building essentially made of solid marble.

I find it infuriating that in this day and age a wheelchair user is unable to gain access to public points of interest. You hear every single day about being politically correct about race, religion and by sex/sexual preference yet there is nothing in place to support those who have disabilities… It’s a joke!

It’s playing on my mind now… If there was a note outside a club/ pub that said “no one who is white is allowed in this club” or “this is strictly a straight pub” or “this club is only for Christians, no other religion is allowed” there would be uproar! And rightly so! So when a wheelchair user is faced with steps and no other way to enter, that is basically what they are doing!!! But that is OK, no one ever says anything about that do they?

Disabled people should be treated the same as everyone else, they shouldn’t be made to feel an inconvenience or have to wait for a ramp to get into a building. I can understand a cab driver needing to get a ramp out, but seriously what is wrong with us? We allow this to happen. It is OK to discriminate against a disabled person but dare you do it to any of the named above. There would be hell to pay.

Even the replacement for the DDA, The Equalities Act 2010 has no mandatory punishment for offending businesses. It is still up to the Disabled person to bring a Private Prosecution to claim compensation for the inconvenience, loss or embarrassment encountered!

Some businesses want to upgrade their buildings but aren’t allowed because they are in a listed building. For a powerchair user, so many places are inaccessible.

My family just got back from Iceland (the country) and they were absolutely stunned at for a country covered in snow and ice- how wheelchair friendly it was – everything was accessible and everywhere was accessible. It’s a shame other countries and even some of the UK can’t follow suit.

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